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::. One partner out earns the other...
In situations where one partner earns more than another, says Dr. Polston, financial competition, power struggles, and feelings of anger, jealousy, and fear of abandonment can occur. "Because money is so laden with symbols of power and achievement, the problems created by one partner out earning the other can threaten the quality of communication and balance in the marriage," she states.
The Solution
Consider what solutions might be beneficial for your peace of mind and, of course, your marriage. Then, take these steps:
Make a date: Broach the subject with your partner in a neutral manner. State that you'd like to set aside some time to talk about financial issues at a time when you're both relaxed.
Communicate carefully: When you're ready to have your financial talk, agree to listen to each other without interrupting. Speak carefully, in a calm tone of voice, with your body language relaxed.
Suggest options: Propose possible solutions. If you can't agree on your suggested solutions, then invite your partner to propose something.
Reach a working compromise: For example, "I accept what you say on the following conditions..."
Keep trying: If you fail to reach an agreement from your first meeting, take a time out and schedule another time to discuss the matter. "You don't have to resolve this or any other issue in one session," says Dr. Polston. What's most important is that you continue to discuss the issue openly and respectfully with each other. This will help your marriage grow stronger and lead to a resolution.
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